Someone once said that commitment can be illustrated by a breakfast of ham and eggs: the chicken donated, but the pig was totally committed.
Today our Lord speaks to us in very strong terms about commitment: “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.” In St. Luke’s Gospel, the words of Jesus are even more disconcerting: “Whoever comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife, and children, brothers and sisters, and yes, even life itself, cannot be my disciple.”
I think most of us instinctively turn up our noses at such a teaching. These do not seem to be the words of the Lord of love, mercy and compassion, the teacher of the Beatitudes.
Can Our Lord mean that our parents and family members are not worthy of our love or deserving of our respect? Doesn’t the third commandment enjoin us to honor our father and mother? Jesus surely loved and respected his Blessed Mother and St. Joseph. So how are we to understand these words?
Many times, Our Lord spoke in hyperbole for the sake of emphasis. We use hyperbole very often when we say things like: “I’m so hungry, I could eat a horse!” “I have a million things to do today.” “When I was your age, I had to walk 15 miles to school, uphill in the snow.” “He is older than the hills.” Here is one you could never use: “Msgr. Gervasio is as thin as a toothpick.”
Our Lord is not telling us that discipleship involves hating our parents and family. He is telling us that discipleship involves putting God first in all things. Where does our relationship with God fall in our list of priorities? Putting God first takes nothing away from our love of others, for when we love God first, we will love others best. This is because love in its truest and purest form comes from God.
How much better will we love others, how enriched and fulfilling our relationships would be if we encounter the Lord at Mass, not just now and then, but regularly; if we bring our life experiences to our prayer daily; if we give our faith the first consideration in making decisions.
Our faith is not a life-style option to be juggled with so many other interests. Christ wants our commitment, not a casual off-and-on relationship.
Yesterday, I had once again the joy of concelebrating the ordination of a priest who will serve in our diocese—Fr. Stephen Sanservere. I witnessed his priestly consecration, his public commitment to serve the Lord and his Church. How extraordinary to know that this man was married for nearly forty years, was a permanent deacon and now offers himself in service to the Lord at the age of 67. He could have re-married, he could have retired, he could have made many other plans, but he put Christ first!
Once we see Christ for who he is, and we taste the sweetness of his love and grace, we will not see these words of Jesus as some onerous demand upon us. Instead, we will see this as our natural response to his beauty and grace. For when we love him first, we will love others best.
Our readings today present us with three recurring themes – commitment, reward, and family. While the Gospel I just read may seem off-putting to some, bear with me as we explore the various readings from this weekend’s liturgy and see some deeper meanings behind the words of Jesus.
In our first reading from Kings, we see the strong interplay of these three themes. The unnamed women in the story shows commitment in caring for Elisha because he is a man of God, offering him first a cup of water, and later setting up a room for him. Elisha, understanding the family dynamics of the day, knew that if her husband died, she would need a son to help her. On learning that she had no son, and in reward for her commitment to him, Elisha promised that she would have a son within a year. While not part of today’s reading, if you read on in Kings, you see that, true to the words of Elisha, the woman had a son within a year.
In our second reading Paul discusses the terms of discipleship. He tells us that if we were baptized into Christ Jesus we were baptized into his death. Each of us, as a commitment of our Baptism must take up our own crosses daily. If we do so, then one day we, like Jesus, may be raised from the dead by the glory of the Father. So, we see both reward and family—the relationship of Jesus with the Father—in play here as well.
That leads us to the Gospel story—the one I said might be off-putting to some: “whoever loves mother or father more than me is not worthy of me”, and “whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me”. Hopefully, we all love mother, father, son, and daughter such that the thought of such love making us unworthy of Christ seems harsh. However, if one were to read just a few paragraphs earlier, in the same chapter of Matthew, one would see Jesus warning of siblings and parents turning on each other because of Jesus. Put in that perspective, it is perhaps easier to understand Jesus saying we must love him more than them. If a family member is intentionally drawing you away from your mission for Christ, then you must choose Christ. That does not mean if a family member is elderly or otherwise impaired and needs your help—and that help, for example, might occasionally pull you away from Sunday mass--that you must abandon the family member. It means, for sure, that you should try to find a better solution to the conflict in the future—maybe mass on Saturday!
Concluding our Gospel today, Jesus promises rewards for those who keep commitments. Even again the commitment of a cup of water that we saw in our first reading that was rewarded by Elisha.
In all our readings today, we see God either actually or by promise rewarding the faithful servant. When it comes to our personal mission for Christ—and we all have one—we can rest assured that God will never be outdone in generosity. He knows our needs before we even ask for them.
Just as God understood the value of family in each of our readings today, the Church has always, and continues to do this. The family has been called the Domestic Church. It is here where faith is first taught by word and deed. In marriage prep courses, we teach our couples that the love between husband and wife is a model of the love that Christ has for the Church. And we all know how deeply Christ loves us—he gave his life for us.
There is a special reason that I speak of commitment, reward, and family today. Mary and I happened to be celebrating our 40th Wedding Anniversary today. We thank God for the grace of commitment, the many rewards we have seen along the way, and our beautiful family which grows ever more so as we enjoy our roles as Grammy and Gramps. Perhaps we all could thank God today for family, large or small, be they here, far away or even at home with Him. We could also remember the other rewards He has given us, those he still promises, and the commitments we keep with His Grace that have helped make them happen. It is something to think about this week. God Bless.